Man arrested after allegedly cling-wrapping MDMA to his dick with Vegemite

We all know that festival goers can be, ahem, inventive when it comes to sneaking drugs into festivals — but this story well and truly takes the fucking cake.

While conducting drug operations at Melbourne’s Listen Out festival on the weekend, police busted a punter who had allegedly slathered drugs in Vegemite and cling-wrapped them around his penis. He was apparently trying to avoid detection by the sniffer dogs in attendance — but to no avail.

Several other festival goers were also found with drugs allegedly strapped to their penises, but only one was game enough to go down the breakfast spread route.

“We found several males had the drugs wrapped in plastic and wrapped around their penis,” Port Phillip Acting Inspector Stuart Bailey told News Corp. “One smothered his MDMA in Vegemite believing the…dog would not be able to detect his drugs. Wrong!”

All up, 24 people were caught attempting to sneak drugs into the festival — but at least none of them wrote their contact details on their MDMA baggy this time.